This could possibly be the most the powerful of the 4 stories that we carry around and build our small sandboxes with. The false belief that we are a burden.
This story tends to develop in us from a very young age and shape how we think of ourselves as the vessels of creative power.
For women, in particular, this is an especially potent invisibility story to explore. We are given messages from the very beginnings of our lives, that we need to take up as little space as possible, be as quiet as possible, be accommodating as possible.
Because when we don't do those things, we are a burden. So we start applying that to our life pretty early on.
Thinking back to my childhood I can remember many times my mother shrunk herself to make room for what other people wanted. She even used the words that she didn't want to be a burden by assering herself in any way.
Those almost very same words have been spoken by her mother, my grandmother many times when it came to her life end. She didn't want to stay with any of her children because she didnt' want to be a burden.
When you're being told that you can't have a new pair of shoes that you need because the electricity bill needs to be paid or that the family can only have meat twice this week because your parents needed to buy medication for you, you tend to develop this feeling that when you need resources, you are a burden.
It's not just about money though. It can be about anything you need in your daily life as a human being. Even love, attention, care.
When we feel that to get what we want, we need to take it away from others. Or others will suffer as a result of needing something.
How does this look visibility wise?
When you set your prices too low because you feel that people who need you won't be able to afford you. Or when you send off your invoice for a job you've done and you feel panic at the thought of the total amount. When you aren't stepping outside of your sandbox because you're afraid that the attention and energy your content requires from people is too much.
These are just a few basic examples but this invisibility story goes very deep. It's not about pricing your products or services. It's the most powerful false belief story we use to determine our value to others.
Why do we tell this story if it's a lie?
Because when we defer the reason for us playing small from ourselves and onto others, it creates the further illusion that that is nothing we can do about it.
I can't become all I am capable of because I don't want to be a burden on someone else.
This statement holds the other person liable for us not being able to develop and exercise our power to the fullest.
We keep to our sandboxes because we don't want to cause upset by leaving the safety of it and demanding more than our fair share.
More love, more power, more attention, more money, more anything.
That email you get from that person that questions the fees you charge. It makes you feel like garbage and so you reduce your fee to accommodate to their budget.
You have just participated in someone else's invisbility story (the one about them being fundamentally flawed (your client's story) with your own, that you don't want to be a burden.
Have you ever wondered why you attract the clients or the audience that you attract? Your invisibility stories have a lot to do with it. Your stories will be reflected in the people coming to you, so looking at their invisibility myths will help you find yours.
I have created a safe space for you to discover your stories. This is a little taste of what it will be like.